Jaimee Morse - I was skimming through your blog and came upon this post and let me tell you it was such a blessing for me to read. I'm just starting out so I'm constantly looking at more experience photographers and admiring their work. Recently I was looking at a photographers website and as I exited out of the window one of my pictures was behind it and all I could do was sigh and kind of frown. But it makes me feel better to know that I'm not the only one who feels like their art is crap sometimes. Thanks for this post!
Bethany Giannini - I think the sign of a good photographer is one who is constantly striving to improve, thinking outside the box, and pushing personal limits. Thank you for sharing that you have some of the same feelings as the rest of us (especially those of us who are just getting started!).
Chris Aram - If the many comments already made don't encourage you, know that, while you may not be the best wedding photographer ever, you are certainly not alone. ;-) I will only say "amen +1." Been there. Felt that. Still live it every day. You put into words much more eloquently a struggle that I identify with, very personally. Keep fighting the good fight ;-)
Chelsea - "The reality is there is no destination. Only a journey" Brilliant.
Sandra - This post made me sit back and say "Really? Her too? Oh my gosh! Really?". Thank you for your honesty.
Kali - I have been reading your blog for over 2 years. This is my first time commenting. Thank you, thank you, thank you for being so honest and real to your readers. I think it is especially hard today in the digital photography world. It is so easy to get down about our own work. With blogs, facebook, twitter and other online networking facilities we are bombarded with other photographers latest and greatest. I have often felt the same way you described, but I am refreshed to hear that you understand that being an artist is a journey and that you are only going to work harder. I absolutely adore your work. I have always looked up to you as a photographer. Your work and the way your run your business has always inspired me and this post makes me like you even more.
MattDJ - MJ, I don't comment on here as much as I used to or want to, but after seeing this post come through I knew I had to stop by to say this: while Arizona may have a stereotype with regards to the landscape, I honestly am blown away every time I see one of your AZ weddings. I literally shake my head thinking how blessed these venues are to have their space captured in such a beautiful and honest style...one that would make anyone want to hold an event there. Being in AZ, you face challenges that many 'togs never will and you are all the better for it. Keep on inspiring and blessing my friend!
Deborah Zoe - thanks for always being a source of encouragement and inspiration. It's encouraging to know you're not "perfect" and that you go through stages just like everyone else:) Keep growing Melissa and inspiring:)
Lor Calhoun - I've already told myself, if the day comes when I don't think I need to get better, I'll hang up my camera strap. Good post.
Brooke - We are definitely our own worst critics. I found this and posted it on Facebook the other day, your post reminded me of it: http://www.flickr.com/photos/sortacrunchy/5595578886/ I believe that you are a REAL one. :)
martin - Ya, I know what you're saying....it can really get to ya if you let it. But that's actually the only really good thing going my way, cause the "quaiity control" fierce judge lies inside of me :) The rest of it, well, I can't control too many things going on, I let those to my Lord.
Dallas - I feel this way quite a bit myself. Then I had to stop when I see others photograph the same places and don't "sensor" what I think is "ugly" and make it beautiful. We may have taller trees and greener grass but I envy your SUN!!! I envy how your buildings reflect light too! I love your desert setting. . . and how it reflects back into how you process your images with a slight magenta hue.
Erica Velasco - Totally felt the same way recently...starting to get out of my "funk"
Tracy Woodger-Broz - Talk about keeping it real! Your honesty always humbles me. You are one of the photographers that inspires me so it feels good to know that you are a mere mortal too. :) I can't wait to meet you in person this July at your workshop in Boulder. Perhaps if I achieve some success as a wedding photographer in CO, I could convince you to come shoot a wedding with me here for a change of scenery. :)
Lise - Seriously, this is like the 5th post that has been a saving grace for me today!! I guess when I put it out in the universe that I need a little hug the universe listens. Thank you for this!! Thank you for understanding what it is like and having the strength to put it out there. You are amazing in all you do and I am so happy I found your comforting words and your incredible ART!!
Stacey Hemeyer - It is nice to know that even an amazing photographer like you doubts herself now and then. Since you are often my inspiration, I would love for you to do a blog post on who inspires YOU! Whose blogs are YOU following and being inspired by?
Lisa Mathewson - Great post, actually one of the best I have read of yours or any other photographer out there. Thanks for putting this out there. I feel like this a lot :)
Noa - Melissa - I always loved you before but now I adore you. Thanks for being raw and real.... "The reality is there's no destination. Only a journey." Oh yes my friend! Its so hard to work within an industry where it feels like its all been done before, you know? But your special capability, my dear, is being able to draw out the personality and story of those you photograph. It makes you stand out, it makes your clients love you, and makes people like me appreciate your work. Sending you hugs from gloomy NJ!!!!
Heather - I'm nowhere near as talented or experienced as you are, but I lose sleep after I shoot a wedding, and I continue to stress until I can look at the photos. I almost always leave a wedding thinking I suck, I've screwed up the couple's special day, I missed this, missed that, I should just quit. It's really terrible. Especially because once I see my photos, they're usually enough to put my mind to rest. But even then, I still beat myself up about what I could have done better. I suppose that feeling is a gift at times - it keeps me on my toes and motivates me to try again next time.
Gail - SUCH well said thoughts Melissa! It's encouraging to hear that professionals such as yourself with years of experience still have those moments of doubts (I think it comes with wearing the label of "artist"—whether you are a photographer, singer, painter or writer) but I just want to say that I look at a lot of those same awesome artists out there, and I'm starting to think their work all begins to look the same in a very carbon-copy way. What I've ALWAYS loved about your work is that I see the uniqueness of each couple with every wedding you shoot. Your style stays consistent but still fresh! Oh, and thanks for taking something that can be a negative for so many of us and putting a positive spin on it! Good for you for setting those goals! One of my own this year is to really try and get comfortable with flash—I still feel like I need to say a prayer that everything works before every reception! haha
shauna maness - i love this... i have to say when i read the title i thought, "tourist artist, hmmm... where are we touring today?" what a dork i am! TORTURED artist... i love this post for a zillion reasons- but the one that rises to the top is honesty. we are all here- ever other day. just last week i was ready to sell my gear and be a walmart greeter- that is what makes us better- that is what grows our work- that is what forces us to press in the the creaTOR to inspire us as the creaTED. i'm with you- 110% keep your head up & eyes wide ;)
Emma Jones - Now I feel better! I too am my own worst critic and am fully inspired by others to improve! Wish so hard I could wave a magic wand, win the lottery, buy a few Canon L lenses and work full time in concentrating on photography with the magic of their low F numbers. But, alas, for me I will simply have to be patient and dream that one day, one day I will get a gorgeous 70-200 or something of similar caliber and be able to concentrate full time on photography.
Diana Gunning - Melissa, do I ever understand that. I look up to you as my mentor. I would love to be where you are at. You never know the internal torment one goes through, just by looking at the outward person. Thanks for being so candid and sharing your emotions.
Melli - Oh I do feel your pain. For a long time I have been feeling (and still feel) like I am platooing in my creativity. I see other photographers' works and am in awe and wish I'd know how to get to where they are. I am trying different strategies in overhauling my work - technically as well as creatively - without trying to destroy my own style (or without looking too much like someone else's and still keep the bit of my own style I have (I think) developed). Photography can be such a hard hard thing to do. And sometimes it can bring the createst pleasures to your life. Above all and everything - I wish you that you keep enjoy doing it. And maybe enjoy these own doubts about your own work, as they are the only ways to keep improving.
Mandy Saladino - Melissa: I am a long-time blog reader, first time commenter. I completely understand your feelings. As a person just embarking on starting her own photography business, I am bombarded with these feelings all the time. I am just starting out, taking my recreational hobby professional. I have the "my work isn't good enough" thought every time I look at blogs of established photographers, much like yourself. However, more recently I've chosen to take those feelings and channel them to inspiration. So I wanted to let you know that your work inspires. It has inspired me; I KNOW this. I hope this thought helps you through! Keep up the great work!
Rupa - Very refreshing to hear when an artist I admire terribly (YOU, MJ!) feels this way as well sometimes. I think as artists, we never truly "arrive" but should always challenge ourselves to push further and better and to "run our own race" in the words of J & M! : ) Cool to see you doing the same after so many years - it will be cool to see what more you discover in this journey and I look forward to doing the same in mine! And although we never truly "arrive", also know that your experience in business and as a photographer and kindness as a person is very valuable and people seek that out because it is so refreshing as well! : )
Melissa - Melissa - when you are having one of your "ho-hum" picture days, think of all the photographers who only wish they were as beautiful and talented as you are. Your work is amazing and I strive everyday to be as great as you! ;) God Bless
Lida Mathews - Melissa, You are extremely talented & I'm trying HARD to get to one of your workshops this year. The great thing about you (and your pictures) is that we can see you in them. I love other photographers but I have to say that I'd love to have your style and your personal touch. You are so impressive! Thank you for allowing us to peak inside your business and take amazing things from it! We so appreciate you! With love, Lida
Adrienne Suarez - Thanks for your honest thoughts. I think we all struggle with those same feelings at times. I know I tear myself apart for my work often. And when I finally do something I feel proud of, I'm always scared I will never create something at that level again. Just remember that the second any of us think we've arrived, that's when we stop growing. It's totally healthy to feel the desire to keep refining your skills, and I think that's what really makes you a great photographer.
Juliana - Hi Melissa. We have never met. I stumbled onto your blog through a friend and have loved hearing about your journey. I am a brand new baby photographer, trying to get me foot in door of this industry and just want to thank you for your honesty and advice. I can relate to this post about tiring of shooting the same places all the time, and I wanted to share another blog that I recently read that I thought was interesting. It was posted on the WPPI blog (http://blog.wppionline.com/2011/04/14/behind-the-shutter-the-art-of-the-destination-shoot/) by Sal Cincotta. You maybe have already read it, but I enjoyed hearing how he kind of overcame this same struggle by adding destination packages to his business. I am no where near this point in my business, but I thought a little encouragement and another photographer's view may help. You do beautiful work, and the attitude you have about it all being a journey it so great! If your work is this great already, think of what it will be in years to come! Be encouraged Melissa:-) I look forward to seeing where God takes your creativity from here!
Myrian Peery - You made a great point, I feel the same way, but I think that is key. That shows that you are truly an artist. If you are content, you will never improve!(although your work to us is flawless).
Janet Kwan - Thanks so much for sharing this, Melissa. Your drive to be better shows why you're a great photographer and artist :)
Betsy Jo - Thanks for this. Ugh. So nice to know I'm not alone... :)
Amory - I really appreciate your candidness. It is nice to know that even those we think have arrived still feel this way. Onward on our journey we go! Love the idea of writing out the goals.
denise karis - oh! I like the goals - mine recently is trying to minimize any sloppy photos - to make each frame count and not take a whole bunch but rather slow down and be a bit cleaner - and dear goodness I am so bored with Mesa locations. :( Right now I'm inspired out my the Superstition Mountains and in recent clients backyards :P Im jealous of people who live in other states though.